[There is one subgroup in Sydney that is almost unanimously hated - lads. They are a distinguisable feature of Sydney, and yet many travellers who come to Sydney and Sydneysiders of a certain generation have no idea who these skinny boys with white hats are.]
A day in the life of a lad
WAKE UP
Yeh time to put on my orange and navy blue striped Nautica polo, my white Saucony shorts, my white Polo Ralph Lauren cap. I hate haven’ to cut the security tags off ‘n’ shit though it’s like my morning hastle eh. And my fresh Nike Tns that I bought with the money earned from selling some stolen GPSs from JB Hi Fi. Fukken good aye.
TRAVEL
Gotta go to Burwood station to do some tags. it’s swaz [sweet as] cuz my Sony Ericsson W800i can play music really loud on the bus. People on the bus don’t know nuffin about good rave music. So I burnt the plastic on the bus seat with my lighter so it reeeeked and they’d shut up their faces and stop lookin.
It’s sick man – at Burwood they can’t get rid of my tag: ‘da man’. It’s cuz I am ‘da man’. Cuz that’s me aye. But I still did a few just in case. Took some old guy’s wallet and bought some durrieszz [cigarettes] but then I jumped the ticket gate and got the first train into the city. But I had to fuck off at Central instead of Town Hall because the fat ass ticket inspectors were on. But doesn’t matter cuz my dealer was running late, we met in the laneway near George Street Maccas.
DAY
I don’t get why no one wants to employ me, ‘da man’. It’s not my fault they don’t want to employ me, they just don’t, so I don’t have a full time job yet - I just steal stuff from Myers. I’ve been caught taking shit there before, I got a ban, but fuck it. Me and my bros need some new polos and shorts. So we’re just gonna hang around [loiter] and til they’re busy then we roll.
LATE AFTERNOON
At Town Hall steps but the police came by but it’s sweet cuz they don’t get us [when speaking pig latin] so I told everyone “eshays adlays” and we went back to the inner west.
NIGHT
We punched some cones [smoked bongs] and then thought about going out. One of us has a car so eight of us got in and we cruised around for some parties. Found some sweet house and started drinking the all the alcohol on offer. Everyone was pretty drunk so they didn’t notice but the cops turned up for some reason so we left and tagged their letter box. arh I don’t remember what happened but someone got me with my lighter when I was passed out so my leg really hurts aye.
(by M.T.)
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I feel this pain.
Well written.
I feel sorry for them sometimes for being a part of this group in society. I’ve known people who were very nice and friendly pulled into this culture. Sure, he and many other like him (both men and women) probably just join in, stand there, laugh at appropriate times and just wander around with whatever it is they do. So this comment is dedicated to you Daniel, who I knew as being a lovely person, being wasted on the lad culture.
Thanks MW and Darshil Shah for showing appreciation! It is a bit painful … a day in the life of a lad, and a day in life … in general. I mean, no one ‘got me with their lighter’ today but the day is not over yet …
But we must strive to appreciate it for what it is.
Yes, cheers to Daniel, ‘da man’, I hope he is well or at least going to a good party
Funny! And well appreciated as Im an American Expat and had no idea why there were so many boyz running around in polos.. and white tennies. Explains alot.
you got the wrong impression of lads
they got you with the lighter when you were passed out didnt they
and why is there a picture of chavs on there ?
anyway swaz and durries are not words used by lads and the person who wrote this is a sad cunt but the lads call him gronk
they look and sound like a group of fags trying too hard